The causes of low self esteem are many. Sometimes they can be identified, and other times they cannot. Whatever, it is a miserable existence when a person does not feel good about themselves. Every aspect of life is affected by these feelings. Success is very hard to achieve when one does not feel good about themselves.
The cause of a poor image of oneself often starts innocently enough. Maybe in childhood a person hears something said and misinterprets it. This makes them feel poorly about themselves. A parent, for example, may make a comment about posture or something similar. The child then interprets it as disapproval on the part of the parent, maybe even thinking they are not good enough to please the parent. It may then become something huge to them.
At other times, sibling rivalry, or co-worker rivalry, can lead to negative feelings of worthiness. If a sibling achieves something for which they get recognition, the other sibling may interpret their parents praise as indicating they are not as good as the one having the achievement. The same is true of co-worker relationships. It is not an intentional put-down, but the person or child may interpret is as such.
Sometimes the put-downs may be intended to be just that. Parents sometimes suffer from mental illnesses, excessive anger, or are just ignorant. They will say things that cause their child to have bad feeling about themselves. They may never show approval of their child. They may not recognize any positive actions, but do note the negative ones and criticize for them. They may actually say hurtful things to their child.
Other times, negative input may come from school mates or co-workers at work. A boss may not recognize positives, but will criticize the person for negative actions. They may even has extremely high expectations that cannot ever be fully met. This causes a feeling of failure, and a lowered self esteem.
There are other things that cause the perception of worth to be thwarted. One is continual failures. Sometimes, a person sets out to accomplish something for which they are neither trained nor qualified, and they will fail. They don't realize it is due to poor preparation, but think they have a flaw that leads to their repeated failure.
Another thing that can lead to low self-worth is being a perfectionist. Such high expectations are set that there is no hope of ever being able to achieve the goal. This, in turn, causes a feeling of failure, even if others consider them a huge success.
Unusual expectations for either a person themselves or their parent or boss, and other causes of low self esteem affect a person adversely. Whether it is accidental or not, the result is the same. The person feels poorly about themselves. The person that lives with such feelings is miserable. They often become immobilized by these bad feelings. This cause the condition to worsen. If it gets bad enough, it is advisable to seek the help of a professional.
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